BREAKING NEWS – Seattle Seahawks Fan Harassed in Boston

January 30, 2015

Breaking News Olympic DuckBreaking News in Boston – One of the Seattle Seahawks most iconic fans, the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck, was harassed at an East Boston park on Friday.  Boston police report the incident took place around 10:00 am EST when a passerby heard yelling coming from the shoreline.  The witness discovered the duck nearly deflated and his prized 12th Man flag stolen.  The witness called 911 immediately and police and paramedics were on site within a few minutes.

The picture above shows the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck before and after the incident.  You can clearly see how deflated the duck became.  The 12th Man flag was stolen and has not been recovered.

According to the police, the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck was taking pictures  with the 12th Man flag when he was approached by a man wearing New England Patriots hooded sweat shirt.  According to the victim, the assailant started yelling at him in a thick Boston accent, “You pahked yah cah in my spot”.  The Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck quickly tried to explain to the assailant, “As a Seattleite, I take mass transit to help lower my carbon emissions and save the environment.”.  According to the victim, that is when the assailant became angry and removed what appeared to be a ball air pump from his sweat shirt.  The assailant then began deflating the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck.  The duck became light headed and lost consciousness.

When paramedics arrived, the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck’s air pressure was seriously low.  “When we arrived on scene, the victim’s air pressure was down to 6.7 PSI (healthy rubber ducks have a PSI 0f 12.2).  We immediately started inflation therapy and were able to stabilize the victim’s air pressure until he could be transported to Mass General.”, the paramedic said.

According to Boston Police, they have strong suspicions that this incident is likely tied to the New England Patriot’s Deflate Gate.  William Evans, Boston’s Police Commissioner, stated, “The similarities of these two incidents cannot be ignored and the Boston Police, with help from the FBI, will be investigating these incidents”.

When asked if this crime exonerates the Patriots from any wrong-doing in the Deflate Gate scandal he replied, “I sure hope so, I’ve got a lot of money riding on this game”.

Within hours, a GoFundMe campaign was started to help cover the Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck’s medical expenses.  Fans throughout the world were posting words of encouragement and support on Olympic Hot Tubs Facebook Page.

The Olympic Hot Tub Rubber Duck is expected to make a full recovery through daily relaxation sessions in his Hot Spring Spa with Ace Salt Water Systems.